if if if

i love snow. if i don't have to work, if there are good books or movies nearby, if i have the right attire, if it's 31 degrees out, if the dog poops and pees in a timely fashion, if the roads are cleared promptly, if. if. if.

i was noticing the other day how often i put clauses on things. i'd love this song if the course were different. i like mornings, but i never get to actually enjoy them. its strange how normal this habit of mine has become. i think it makes the excitement and joy of a blessing less genuine. i don't think of myself as a bitter person, but i think this is really one of the ways that i have become a bit jaded.

a few days ago, jess challenged me to not complain for an entire day. she had read a blog that challenged her the same and shared with me. it was a really fruitful day. God used me that day in ways i didn't think he needed me for. surely it wasn't because i didn't complain about having a bad hair day, but it truly did change the way i spoke and behaved. it was a good skill to practice.

i am going to try to live life with less clauses this month. less ifs and buts. please keep me accountable to this. thanks for reading friends! loves!!